forgive and forget ? NO

A grandmother is supposed to be a gem; but surely not mine. For 9 difficult years, I lost myself and never once contacted my paternal family. I have no regrets as I they do not deserve any compassion for what they have done and said to me. Forgiveness is not something I want to give her or her son and I am well and I have moved on. Life is beautiful and wonderful. And why do I bring this up now ? Well...as I was driving to a shopping mall last weekend, my phone rang. The number on the screen was unfamiliar but I have a habit of answering all calls. I accepted the call and was shocked to hear the voice at the end end. It was the long lost and gladly forgotten grandmother. After 9 long years she calls and tells me she misses me ? What the heck...what about years 1 to 8 ? Didn't she miss me then ! I cut the conversation short and told her I was driving. And then she wanted to know about my mum and why she couldn't locate my mum. Aiya....I was beginning to feel irritated and it could be heard in my voice. My mum warned me later never to ever tell on her. My mum....... Many of you will be thinking what a heartless person I am for treating a 90 year old woman like that. Maybe I am and maybe I'm not. My father was busy womanizing as my mum was in her last month of pregnancy and when my mum called him in Penang to tell him that it was time, a woman answered the phone. I was too young to remember much except for what my Grandma (mum's mum) told me. Shortly, my mum left him and my evil grandmother made my mum pay her share for the furniture paid for the wedding. My mum cried for months. She left penniless and went back to live with my grandparents who warmly welcomed her home. To add to the bitterness, that evil old woman welcomed that bitch into her home with open arms. My mum and grandparents were never people to bear grudges and encouraged my brothers and I to spend school holidays with my father and his parents. Young as I was, I never understood anything beyond fun ! The years went by and one day I found myself in a terrible argument with my granddad (mum's dad) and I ran away to my father's (or rather his parents) home. As soon as I arrived, that evil old woman dumped a really huge load of my father's clothes on me and told me to wash it. Though there was a washing machine in the house, it was only for show. And so I had to wash XXL towels and jeans by hand everyday. There were times that I finished so late that I never had a chance to have dinner and went to bed on an empty stomach. That's in addition to the fact that it took so long to wash his clothes that my school uniform never had enough time to dry. That's right...I had to wear wet or damp uniform to school the next day. There were even days when I had to walk to school (and it was about a 2 hour walk) because nobody bothered if I had money for school or bus fare. I couldn't take it anymore and moved back to live with my mum, grandma and granddad. He gave my brother and I a total of RM30 a month which couldn't even cover bus fare and even for that miserable amount, I almost had to beg him for the money each month. I was about 14 that time and one day, that evil woman took me aside and told me, "Don't take money from your Daddy anymore. He has not got a new family to take care of." What about me ? What about my brothers ? Who's going to feed us or provide us with an education ? Is this a grandmother that anyone would want to forgive. Call my father a successful businessman or whatever you please but we know the truth. He is a bastard, asshole and slime that even the good earth would reject ! My mum left with nothing; he never paid any alimony or child support (well I wouldn't call RM10 or RM30 child support !). My mum had to start her life from scratch while he brought that bitch a brand new 2-seater red sports car. While his sons went to private schools, educated overseas and had the best food, my dear grandparents were struggling to raise up without any income except for the monthly allowances from my 2 aunts and my mum. So yes, I DO hate her and NO I will never meet her. I am not unfortunate but rather extremely fortunately to have been blessed with such a wonderful and loving maternal family.