This email brought tears to my eyes. I asked myself how Ayden's parents must feel. The loss must have been excruciating. His smile is angelic and innocent. God must have loved him so much more. Here's the email....
The past weeks have come and gone without me as I still feel I am living in a terrible dream. Every moment of everyday is another moment without my beautiful baby Ayden. If I could give up my life for him I would, I know there is nothing that I wouldn’t have given up for him. It’s as if my life stopped the day he passed, he took my heart with him and it will never be the same again.On 2nd May 2009, Ayden was born at 37 weeks after a completely normal pregnancy. He weighed 3.24 kg and was absolutely beautiful. When he was 4 days old, he was given 2 days of phototherapy due to jaundice and we were told he was perfectly fine. When he was 9 days old, he suddenly turned pale and was rushed to the hospital and admitted into NICU. 24 hours later, my baby passed away. This was one month ago.All tests for infection and metabolism have come back negative and we are still trying to cope with his loss, let alone the reason for his passing. The doctors have debated over this and are unable to give us a reason. Unlike SIDS, Ayden was less than a month old and deteriorated very rapidly despite the various medical interventions administered. Words cannot express the sorrow and pain we are enduring, there is not a minute that goes by that I do not yearn for him. The most difficult part is the not knowing. I guess I am writing this so I would not have to go into reliving the horror every time someone asks ”what happened?” While we appreciate everyone’s concern and we understand they mean well, nothing anyone does or says will change things or bring him back. We are left to pick up the shattered pieces of our hearts and continue our lives without him.When we left the hospital, we had nowhere to turn to. There were no support groups or information given on situations like ours despite our requests for it. We were hopelessly left alone to deal with our grief. All I wanted was to talk to someone who had gone through a similar experience, to tell me I will be ok, to understand my grief. I managed to find help through an online support group by people who have all walked down this path. It was heartbreaking that this had happened to so many people, but also comforting that many of them have continued to have perfectly healthy children afterwards.In memory of Ayden and the lack of information and unavailability of a support group in Malaysia, we would like to appeal for your help. We do not know anyone else who has experienced such a tragedy, but to ensure that other families going through this horrible experience will not have to go through it alone, we will greatly appreciate if you can inform the people you may know who have travelled this road to get in touch with us, if they are willing. They can write to us at aydenhansen@gmail.com.Hugs, Jo and Sune.
It is with my sincere hope that any of you can share with Jo and Sune will contact them.
Rest in peace Baby Ayden.
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With work, housework, family obligations and our bad habit of putting things off until the last minute, getting a last minute gift can be a nerve curdling experience. For the Chinese there is an all time solution when all else fails - the all season, all occassion and forever welcomed "ANG PAU". It's a red packet with money. It's not that bad if we are at the very least living in the same country. There have been many times when I was asked to arrange for a gift for a colleague overseas. It is not only hard to find but it is also darn expensive ! Found this advert in a local magazine and the first thing that crossed my mind was how useful it would be for someone overseas to send a gift to a friend or family in Malaysia. Check them out here.
